athlete supportConfidenceFeelingsHealthinjury recoveryMindset
What I Wish I Told Myself During Recovery
If I could sit beside a younger version of myself, the one navigating injury, setbacks, and uncertainty, I wouldn’t start with a strategy.
I’d start with this:
You’re allowed to slow down and it doesn’t mean you’re giving up.
You’re allowed to feel this and it doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with you.
You can trust yourself and figure things out along the way.
When you’re in recovery as a teen girl athlete, it can feel like everything is moving so fast… except your recovery!
You see your team still playing. And your routine has been totally disrupted and your body isn’t behaving in the same way. And somewhere in all of that, it’s easy to turn inward and start being hard on yourself. I mean so hard!
I Wish I Had Given Myself More of This
Looking back, this is the biggest one.
I pushed myself. Didn’t want to let my team down while also not wanting to see myself as weak or incapable. So I kept going even when it would have been good to take a pause. I minimized what I was feeling and tried to “be fine” all the time.
But I wasn’t fine. The one time I remember my back being in so much pain from a snowboarding accident that I could hardly walk.
Research in sport psychology shows that injured athletes often experience increased anxiety, reduced confidence, and disruptions to their athletic identity during recovery (sport psychology; Brewer, Van Raalte, & Linder; Wiese-Bjornstal et al.). That emotional load is real and it deserves real care, not criticism. If I could go back to that young me who thought putting on the brave face and being a “good girl” was the only way,
I’d say:
How are you really doing today? What’s on your mind- because it matters.
That little dose of compassion would have helped me tune into what was really going on for me at different moments. I would have listened to myself better and trusted what I needed to take care of me. I think my recovery would have been far easier that way.
I Wish I Had Trusted Myself More
There’s something that happens often when people get injured.
They start looking outside of themselves for answers:
What does the doctor say?
What does my mom think?
What about coach expectations?
And it is so amazing to have professionals by your side, people that care, people that have training and wisdom- those voices matter.
Here’s what I wish I understood then:
You are the most important part of your own recovery.
Your knowing (intuition, gut feeling) is worth listening to.
Your experience matters.
This doesn’t mean ignoring professional advice.
It means:
Asking questions
Taking time to process
Noticing what feels aligned (or not)
Speaking up when something doesn’t feel right
Leaning on a trusted adult to help you advocate for yourself
If something feels off, you’re allowed to pause and say:
“Can we talk about this more?”, “I just to think about this a little more”
This is the process of starting to trust yourself more.
I Wish I Had Been More Curious
Recovery can bring up a lot of thoughts:
“Why is this taking so long?”
“I should be further along”
“What’s wrong with me?”
But what if we shifted that? Instead of:
“What’s wrong with me?”
Asking:
“What’s happening for me right now?”
Curiosity creates space.
Instead of:
Why is this taking so long?
Asking:
“How do I feel about the steps being taken in my recovery? Are there things I’m unsure of? What questions do I have?”
This creates space to notice your body, understand your emotions and your thoughts, and respond instead of react to your needs. Over time, that space builds trust.
I Wish I Had Used My Mind as a Tool, Not an Enemy
One of the most powerful things I’ve learned (and now use often) is visualization.
I imagine:
My body healing
Myself back in my sport
Moving with strength and confidence
This isn’t about pretending everything is fine. It’s about supporting your nervous system and your belief in what’s possible.
Mental imagery has been shown to support recovery and performance by activating similar neural pathways as physical practice.
Simply Put?
Your brain can help your body heal more than you’d think.
And it doesn’t have to look one specific way.
It might be:
Visualization
Meditation
Quiet moments imagining your body healing and mending
Even just holding onto hope
There are incredible stories of athletes using this approach to support healing. One remarkable one is Tatiana Straathof, whose work with athletes (goalies especially) highlights the power of focus, persistence, and belief.
Your Path Is Your Path
If I could say one more thing to recovering younger me, it would be this:
There is no perfect way to recover.
The Timeline. Mindset. Course of Action. There is only your path. And yes if I went through an injury again today, I would do things differently.
More compassion.
More patience.
More trust.
But I also deeply believe this. Everything I went through shaped who I am now. And the same is true for you. Recovery really isn’t about getting back to where you were. It’s about discovering who you are when things are hard… and discovering you’re still strong there too.
If You’re a Parent Reading This
If you’re here because your teen is in recovery right now, you don’t have to have all the answers. And you are likely relying heavily on the expertise of the community to support you right now.
Please know that your presence, your patience, and your willingness to listen to whatever your teen daughter is experiencing matters so much more than you think.
Share this with her, or take pieces of it and bring it into your conversations together.
Let’s Keep Walking Together
If this message resonated with you, you’re already part of the community.
I appreciate you!
I’d love to invite you into our email community, a caring online space where we share 2–3 thoughtful notes each week with resources, tools, and real-life encouragement for raising (and being) resilient teen girls.
No pressure. No perfection. Just support, insight, and a lot of “oh wow, that makes sense.”
Let’s walk this path together with presence, courage, and a little more ease.
Join here and receive your free download:
No More Walking on Eggshells: A Guide to Courageous Conversations with Your Teen
