01 Apr
Anxiety, Counselling, Emotions, For Parents, For Teens, Self-Compassion, Uncategorized

When Life Doesn’t Go as Planned…

When life doesn't go as planned

When Life Doesn’t Go as Planned: How to Handle Disappointment and Move on Stronger! 

You studied hard, but that test score? Yikes. You put yourself out there, but that friendship still feels one-sided and draining. Maybe your family rules are keeping you from that weekend hangout, and it sucks! Disappointment stings, no doubt. Here’s a question- how well are you able to shake it off and try again? Because that is where your power lies.

Bouncing back when life doesn’t go as planned isn’t about ignoring the feels (we’re all about being real with feelings in The Happiness Path group). It’s about giving yourself space to feel whatever is coming up, then getting to a place where you can flip the switch. What can you learn? What’s Plan B? What’s the next step I want to take? Every setback is a setup for something better—if you let it be. The real secret? Shifting your attention from what went wrong, to what’s next.

>>> FREE DOWNLOAD: Mental Health Handbook for Teen Girls <<<

So next time life throws a plot twist your way, remember: You are way more resilient than you think. And if you’re willing to try a little help finding your bounce-back magic, THP (The Happiness Path) is your go-to space to build confidence, crush stress, and handle life’s ups and downs.

When life doesn't go as planned

Chantal Côté
Registered Psychologist & Teen Life Coach
Founder of Pyramid Psychology and The Happiness Path

28 Mar
Anxiety, Confidence, Counselling, Emotions, For Parents, For Teens, Relationships, Uncategorized

From Feeling Alone to Connected

From Feeling Alone to Connected: Finding Your Way out of Loneliness

Sam scrolled through her phone for the twelfth time that night. She was watching her friends’ group chat light up with plans she wasn’t invited to. Maybe they don’t actually like me, she thought, her chest tightening. Lately, she’d felt invisible, surrounded by people all the time in the hallways at school and online in chats-  but it was like no one really saw her or cared if she was there. She wanted to reach out, but the fear of being rejected or bothering people kept her silent.

Feeling lonely can be overwhelming. No matter how lonely you feel, please know you’re not alone in this. So many teen girls experience the same thing—wanting deeper friendships but not knowing how to find them. Sometimes, the right people are closer than you think; it just takes the right space to learn how to connect. That’s why THP (The Happiness Path) was created—to bring girls together in a safe, supportive group where real friendships form and teens can start to feel confident to make new friends. After THP, teens can go from feeling alone to connected.

>>> FREE DOWNLOAD: Mental Health Handbook for Teen Girls <<<

In THP, girls like Sam learn how to build confidence in social situations, recognize their worth, and surround themselves with people who truly care. If you’ve ever felt like you don’t belong, THP can help you find the connections and confidence you’ve been looking for. You don’t have to do this alone—your people are out there, and this is your chance to find them.

With gratitude, 


Chantal Côté
Registered Psychologist & Teen Life Coach
Founder of Pyramid Psychology and The Happiness Path

28 Mar
Anxiety, Confidence, Counselling, Emotions, For Parents, For Teens, parenting teens, Relationships, Uncategorized

How to Help Your Teen Become Brave

How to Help Your Teen Become Brave

Did you know your teen daughter is likely having thoughts that they might fail at the important things in life?—whether it’s school, friendships, or future plans. The pressure to succeed and meet expectations can leave them so stressed, anxious, and stuck in self-doubt. While your instinct might be to encourage them to push through or think about it as a necessary part of getting to the next part of their journey, a powerful yet often overlooked tool is learning to pause and be present in the moment- this can help your teen become brave.

The Happiness Path: Teen Coaching to Build Resiliency Against Anxiety & Social Awkwardness  CLICK HERE FOR DETAILS <<<

 

Your Teen Can Become Resilient

Imagine guiding teen girls to tune into their thoughts, emotions, and surroundings, helping them break free from the cycle of replaying past events or constantly stressing over the future. When they practice mindfulness and self-awareness, they gain clarity and confidence. Instead of being consumed by “what ifs” and worst-case scenarios, they can find space between the moment and their response. This grows their power to face challenges with a sense of “I can handle this” and focus. This shift not only eases their anxiety but also empowers them to make choices that align with what matters most to them, rather than just doing what they think they should do.

In our 6-week group program, The Happiness Path (THP), we dedicate week 2 to helping teenagers experience being present and practice in real-time with creative and fun exercises. By strengthening their ability to be present, your daughter can navigate life’s pressures with resilience and intention. They learn that failure isn’t something to fear—it’s part of growth. And more importantly, they begin to see that success isn’t just about meeting expectations but about building a future that feels meaningful and fulfilling to them. And that is how we can help your teen become brave!

Chantal Côté
Registered Psychologist & Teen Life Coach
Founder of Pyramid Psychology and The Happiness Path

28 Mar
Anxiety, Confidence, Counselling, Emotions, For Parents, For Teens, parenting teens, Self Image & Body Image, Self-Compassion, Uncategorized

Eliminate Negative Self Talk

How Teens Can Eliminate Negative Self Talk

Why Your Thoughts Aren’t Always True…

Have you ever caught yourself thinking, “People don’t like me,” or “I’m not good enough for my friends”? You’re not alone. Many teen girls struggle with these thoughts, especially when dealing with feelings of anxiety, social pressure, or self-doubt. But here’s the truth—just because you think something doesn’t make it real. What do you see? 

Your brain sees things in a certain way and it can sometimes get stuck in thinking patterns that are harsh. Those thoughts aren’t facts. They’re just stories and patterned thoughts your mind tells you based on fear or past experiences.

>>> FREE DOWNLOAD: Mental Health Handbook for Teen Girls <<<

The good news? You can change the story to eliminate negative self talk. When negative thoughts pop up, try asking yourself: Is this 100% true? Would I say this to a friend? What’s a more realistic way to see this? Shifting your self-talk takes practice, but it’s possible. That’s one thing we we focus on in THP (The Happiness Path)—helping teen girls challenge self-doubt, build confidence, and create strong, supportive friendships. You don’t have to figure it out alone. If you’re ready to start believing in yourself and seeing your worth, you’re in the right place.

Chantal Côté
Registered Psychologist & Teen Life Coach
Founder of Pyramid Psychology and The Happiness Path

21 Jan
Anxiety, Emotions, For Teens

What’s Your Learning Style?

To take the “What’s Your Learning Style” quiz in PDF format, click here

 

Exams, Finals, and Tests: The Ultimate Guide to Supporting Stressed Teens (and Staying Sane)

Exams and tests can feel like monumental events for teens, even though as a parent, you might see them as A STEP in the larger journey of life. Understanding why this phase feels so overwhelming—and how you can support your teen effectively—can help ease their stress and strengthen your connection.

Why do exams feel like a big deal to teens?  What happens in the brain when teens are stressed, and how do we help them navigate these moments? 

>>> FREE DOWNLOAD: Depression & Anxiety Toolkit for Parents Raising Teen Girls <<<

Why Exams Feel So Big to Teens

During the teenage years, the brain is in a phase of rapid growth and development, particularly in the prefrontal cortex—the part responsible for decision-making, impulse control, and understanding long-term consequences. Because this area isn’t fully developed, it means teens often feel like the stakes are incredibly high in the present moment.

Combine this with heightened emotions, peer pressure, and their own internal expectations, and it’s no wonder exams can feel like a “make or break” moment of their lives. As adults, we know that one test won’t define their future, but for teens, this perspective is harder to grasp fully.

>>> FREE DOWNLOAD: Depression & Anxiety Toolkit for Parents Raising Teen Girls <<<

What Happens in the Brain During Stress?

When teens experience stress, their brain activates the amygdala, the part responsible for the fight-flight-freeze response. This increases endorphins and cortisol- all those wonderful natural chemicals that prepare them to deal with a threat, which can make them feel anxious, irritable, or even panicked.

In this state, it’s harder to focus, retain information, and think clearly. So understanding this can help you approach their stress with more calm and empathy. 

>>> FREE DOWNLOAD: Depression & Anxiety Toolkit for Parents Raising Teen Girls <<<

3 Ways to Support Your Teen Through Exam Stress

1. Listen First, Fix Later

As much as you might want to jump in and encourage better study habits, the most impactful thing you can do is listen.

  • Ask questions like, “What’s feeling overwhelming right now?” or “What do you feel is putting the most pressure on you?”
  • Be curious about their expectations and what’s driving their stress.
  • Avoid minimizing their feelings. Instead, validate them by saying, “That does sound like a lot to handle right now.”

By creating space for them to express their worries, you show them that you’re in their corner, which can instantly relieve some of the weight they’re carrying

thinking learning style

  1. Take a Breath (Literally)

Teens don’t just learn from what we say—they absorb our emotional states too. This is called co-regulation. If you’re feeling calm, their nervous system picks up on that and starts to mirror it.

Before you respond to their stress, take a moment to breathe deeply and ground yourself. This simple act helps you model calmness and reinforces a sense of stability for your teen.

 

  1. Validate and Empathize

You may not know exactly what it feels like to be a 15-year-old girl about to write a social studies final today, but you do know what it’s like to feel stressed, overwhelmed, or misunderstood.

  • Acknowledge their feelings without judgment.
  • Maybe try, “I can see why this feels so big to you right now,” or “It makes sense that you’re feeling this way.”

Validation builds trust and shows them that you’re not dismissing their experience, even if you view it differently.

Practical Tips for Supporting Study Habits

Once you’ve connected emotionally, your teen might be more open to exploring with you ways to study effectively. 

Want to know more about your teens, dominant learning style, and how to best study accordingly?  Download our quiz and information on representational systems here. 

Here are a few ideas based on their dominant learning style:

>>> FREE DOWNLOAD: Depression & Anxiety Toolkit for Parents Raising Teen Girls <<<

Visual Learners

visual learning style

With this learning style teens can benefit from:

  • A clean, organized study space with minimal distractions.
  • Color-coded notes, diagrams, or flashcards.
  • Using mind maps to organize information.

Auditory Learners


With this learning style teens can benefit from:

  • Background music (without lyrics or the same song on repeat) to create a focused atmosphere.
    Reading notes out loud or recording themselves and playing it back.
  • Studying in a space where they can talk through concepts aloud.

Kinesthetic Learners

  • Using colorful pens and tactile materials like sticky notes.
  • Incorporating movement into studying, such as pacing while reviewing notes.
  • Writing and rewriting information to help it stick.

Helping Teens Find What Works

Many teens are still figuring out how they learn best. The traditional education system teaches for the masses, but learning is highly individualized. Encourage your teen to experiment with different methods and environments to discover what feels most effective for them.

For example, instead of long hours of studying, they might benefit from shorter, focused sessions with frequent breaks. Some teens benefit from a body double or studying with friends while others find that super distracting. 

Celebrate small wins, like when they retain information more easily or feel less stressed during a study session.

>>> FREE DOWNLOAD: Depression & Anxiety Toolkit for Parents Raising Teen Girls <<<

Shifting the Perspective

Exams might feel high-stakes for your teen, but they’re also opportunities for growth. With your support, they can start to see these moments as learning opportunities—not reflections of their worth.

By listening, staying calm, and helping them experiment with tools that work for them, you’re showing them that success isn’t about perfection. It’s about resilience, effort, and having trusted allies by their side.

With so much love,
Chantal

Note taking

 

 

 

 

 

 

To take the “what’s your learning style” quiz in PDF format, click here

Chantal Cote
I am a registered psychologist and teen coach working with teen girls around the globe (and their parents) to help them build Unbreakable Mindsets.

I was born in Ontario and raised in Alberta. As a result of my family encouraging us to speak French growing up (I didn’t always love it as a teen though!), I am bilingual. I love being close to the mountains and am in awe every time I see the beautiful landscapes. One day I might trade my winter jacket in for a bathing suit and a pair of flip flops, but for now Calgary is home.

I look at mental wellness as part of a Whole System. “After food comes mood” and “You’re the average of the five people you spend the most time with” are sayings that make a lot of sense to me. Therefore, when I work with teens, I collaborate with them to get a clear picture of how their lifestyle, experiences, and biological makeup influence how they feel every day. I also believe it is so important to mine for their strengths and resources. Bringing those to life for teen girls, results in them becoming their most resilient and confident selves.

I help teen girls who are struggling with their confidence, are feeling anxious, overwhelmed, or shut down a lot of the time, and want things to be different. Most certainly the struggle is affecting their self-image, their relationships, and so importantly their mental wellness.

Over the years, I have given myself permission to explore my creative side. I’m also drawn to physical fitness and sport and feel so at home in nature. I work really well with teens who have some creative connections (whether that’s drawing, painting, writing, acting, fashion, playing and making music, etc.). I also get the world of sport and connect well with teens who have an athletic side.

If you’re curious about the specialized areas of training I have:

  • Acceptance and Commitment Therapy
  • Expressive Arts Therapy
  • Compassion Focused Therapy
  • Trauma focused (through the expressive arts, progressive counting, trauma sensitive yoga, and narrative approaches)
  • Grief and Loss
  • Functional Family Therapy
  • Nutrition for Mental Health
  • Attachment based parenting
  • Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction (MBSR)
  • HeartMath

Chantal is registered for direct billing with the following insurance providers:

  • Canada Life
  • Manulife
  • Green Shield
  • Blue Cross
  • NIHB
  • Medavie Blue Cross
  • Lethbridge School Division benefits

Other insurance providers may have the option for reimbursement. Please check with your provider.

Screen time blog creative
03 May
For Parents, For Teens

Screen Time Wisdom

Screen Time Wisdom

Screen Time Wisdom from Teens Who Know Best…..But Might Just Need a Little Help Implementing.

Screen time.

As the parent of a teen girl, those two words might conjure up thoughts nightmares are made of.

  • Phone.
  • No phone.
  • Social media.
  • No social media.
  • Limitations.
  • Restrictions.
  • Overuse.
  • Addictions.
  • Permanent digital footprint.
  • Cyber bullying.

Just to name a few things you might be considering when it comes to your teen and her screen time. 

I, like many, am navigating this world with my teen right now. A world where it seems like technology is master. I’m also a psychologist who’s been working with teens for over 10 years so I’ve gotten to see the many faces of technology. 

Whether you’re thinking about the impact of her online content consumption or the way others behave towards one another online, there’s no doubt It’s a complex issue- 

Where to draw our line as parents? How do we encourage and teach our children (teens) to use technology in reasonable and safe ways? 

For more information from some leading experts talking about these issues try checking out: 

What I want to share with you today is inspired by the teens I’ve worked with over the past 10+ years. Teens of all ages who have questioned, evaluated, and taken action on their screen time choices. 

Lessons from your daughters:

  • Going on regular “tech detoxes”. The teens I’ve worked with have tried a variety of detoxes including reducing their screen time by a small amount each day, choosing a weekly tech free day, and even deleting social media apps altogether for a month.

detox image

  • The benefits of gaming and being online. In-depth reflection and conversation has led some of the teens to realize that their online presence has helped them in many ways. Helping them break through social anxiety, getting really good at a craft or skill, discovering stuff about themselves, and connecting them to a like-minded community. It’s not all bad.
  • Parental guidance. OK this one, they may not have ever admitted saying, but quite a few of the teen girls “appreciate” the guidance and the little nudges to be off their devices and doing other types of things.
  • Technology for mental health. I love when a teen introduces me to an app or an online community that is focused on their wellness. I have had the privilege of being introduced to platforms teen girls actually use to improve their mental health. Apps, such as Finch, CalmHarm, Breeze, Habitica, Mindshift, and many more.
  • What I would tell my younger self (younger sibling). When I ask this question 9 times out of 10,  teens tell me their advice for their younger person would be to wait as long as they can before they start using social media, to avoid platforms that constantly show them videos and pictures they compare themselves to, and to enjoy things outside of screen time.

Pretty wise right!

That being said, you might appreciate the strong pull towards being on your screen, and how habit forming it can be. So even if your teen may already have some great ideas and insights; she will need your support, encouragement, and guidance to turn those wise ideas into wise actions.

Sometimes the most impactful thing we can do is simply start by questioning, evaluating and taking action with our own screen time choices to start that ripple effect. 

Love, 

Chantal

This Article: “Screen Time Wisdom” was written by: Chantal | Pyramid Psychology

12 Apr
Anxiety, For Teens, Uncategorized

What is EMDR and how will it benefit my daughter?

What is EMDR and how will it benefit my daughter? I had the opportunity to become trained in eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR) last summer, and it has been cool to see how effective the approach has been for some of my clients. EMDR uses some type of bilateral stimulation, which is a fancy way of saying both sides of the body are being stimulated.

EMDR article creative

The classic stimulus is moving your eyes back and forth from left to right, but it can also be crossing your arms and tapping your;

  • Shoulders

  • Tapping your knees

  • Holding buzzers that buzz in your hands

  • Auditory tones…

While undergoing bilateral stimulation, I guide my clients through a process of remembering a traumatic memory and reprocessing said memory in a more healthy and positive way. Depending on the client, there may be only one memory to process, whereas others will have 10 or more.

While no one knows for sure how EMDR works (there are several theories out there), the research and client feedback continues to prove that it does work. What does “work” even mean, you may ask? That would be a good question.

At its core, EMDR therapy is based on the theory that previous unprocessed traumatic experiences are showing up as symptoms in the present.

The symptoms may be;

  • High anxiety

  • Panic

  • Triggers

  • Feeling overwhelmed

happiness pill program banner

When the previous traumatic experiences are reprocessed, the nervous system no longer responds in an over-reactive way to stimuli in the present. There are a lot of fascinating studies out there that show a remarkable difference in brain activity between before completing EMDR therapy and after if you’d like to see! 

A common response that I hear from clients is that when they think about the previous traumatic memory after completing EMDR.  They say that they no longer have an emotional reaction to it.

An incident or experience that previously resulted in sensations of anxiety or panic is now remembered in a more factual, calm manner. Clients also share that after several EMDR sessions (the number of sessions varies by client and circumstance), they notice that they are less triggered in the present. EMDR is not hypnosis or changing the facts, it’s just helping your brain process a previous experience that it was not able to at that point in time.

EMDR is not the best fit for everyone, and some of my clients prefer more traditional talk therapy over EMDR sessions. There are many paths to better health and wellness, and I am happy to take the client’s lead. I will say, however, that for clients who may not want to express previous traumas verbally, EMDR can be an incredible tool.

If you would like to learn more about EMDR and if it may be a good fit for you, please book a consult call or first session.

BOOK AN EMDR APPOINTMENT

This article: “What is EMDR and how will it benefit my daughter?” Written by:  Jessa Tiemstra 

 

talk about depression
27 Dec
Anxiety, Emotions, For Teens

Tips to Talk to Your Teen About Depression

Tips to Talk to Your Teen About Depression

Learning how to talk about depression with your teen is not an easy task; as a parent of a teen girl, and therapist working with teens too – I KNOW this can be a challenge! But when we recognize that are teens are struggling and something doesn’t feel right, as parents we need to step in. We want to step in because we want to help! Also, lot of us did not grow up with all this new mental health knowledge, our teens probably have a pretty good vocabulary and awareness on more than we give them credit for. As parents we know our teens best, we can often recognize when they are not themselves. So what do we do and how can we approach our kids when we begin to see them struggle. 

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The Happiness Pill: Teen Coaching to Build Resiliency Against Anxiety & Social Awkwardness  CLICK HERE FOR DETAILS <<<

6 Weeks of group coaching to help teen girls navigate big emotions like anxiety and overwhelm, feel confident from the inside out (including with her body image), and handle social anxiety like a BOSS.

The Happiness Pill

———

talk to your teen about depression

Photo by Yuris Alhumaydy on Unsplash

If your teen seems to be struggling with some intense feelings or their mood has visibly changed, maybe they have habits that seem different. It could all warrant a conversation. I would recommend approaching your teen when things are calmer in your house, i.e not right after school when chaos could be prevalent. You want to make sure that you are also in a good headspace, take a minute to make sure that you are coming from a place of love and concern. Once you have a calm atmosphere and you are calm yourself, I would try asking them if anything has happened lately. Mention that you have noticed that they are not spending time with their friends as much or doing the activities they love. Coming from a place of love tell them that you are concerned and want to know if there is anything that perhaps that could have occurred at school or an incident with friends. If your teen cannot pinpoint anything directly, it is a good time to open the discussion about mental health. You could ask them if they want to go for a walk or a coffee or play a game. By engaging in an activity, you kind of take the pressure off of your teen, and it can also help relax your teen making them more likely to engage in conversation. 

 

Depression and anxiety are very common, and everyone experiences feelings of sadness and anxiety at some point. Teens often don’t realize that this is normal and can get really worried about it. Telling your teen that this is normal and that it is ok to feel anxiety and depression, and just because they feel sad or anxious, does not mean you are depressed or have anxiety. Discussing these feelings in a safe place and space will help your teen feel more comfortable. Let them know that it is ok and that you are always there to help and to talk. Talking about it

talk to your teen about depression

Photo by Eric Ward on Unsplash

can help so much on its own! If your teen struggles with being open with you, that’s ok, try not to take it too personally. It may be a good time to look up a counsellor for your teen, as having someone trusted and confidential can really help. Let them know that seeing a counsellor is really just part of keeping your health in check. At Pyramid Psychology we are here to help, listen and provide tools for your teen when they are experiencing times of distress. Good luck, and please reach out for a free consultation HERE if you would like further support.

 

Love,

Tara Aldie

Graduate Student in Counselling offering affordable counselling for teen girls (11-18 years old) online, and in person in Airdrie, Alberta

*1:1 services available for teen girls living in Alberta, Canada – $40 per session. Free consultation here.

———

The Happiness Pill: Teen Coaching to Build Resiliency Against Anxiety & Social Awkwardness  CLICK HERE FOR DETAILS <<<

6 Weeks of group coaching to help teen girls navigate big emotions like anxiety and overwhelm, feel confident from the inside out (including with her body image), and handle social anxiety like a BOSS.

The Happiness Pill

———

 

About Tara

Hello, my name is Tara, and I am a graduate student in counselling, I will be doing my practicum at Pyramid Psychology and I am very excited to practice all the skills I have learned as well as develop new relationships.

I have experience working with youth and teens and I also navigate parenting to four of my own kids. I tend to work with a solution focused, client centred and cognitive behavioural approach. I know that being a teen is tough, and sometimes are problems exasperated by social media and technology.

I struggled with fitting in as a teen, and I really felt that I didn’t belong. After years of soul searching and many personal ups and downs, I realized that my uniqueness was a strength. My goal is to help navigate through these difficult times while promoting self-discovery and personal strengths.

I understand that parents can often feel confused and left out of their teen’s life. I look to bridge the gap between these differences through positive communication. Teens need all the support they can get; the world and relationships can often seem crazy and unrelatable. I work to help bring closeness within existing supports and help develop and foster relationships.

With art, music, writing, play and movement we can work together to help promote self-discovery. I look forward to creating a positive and healing journey with you!

Book a free consultation with me here.

Serving teens in Alberta age 11-18, online or in person (Airdrie, Alberta).

20 Dec
For Parents, For Teens, Relationships, Teen Joy

5 Holiday Mindfulness Tips for Teens

5 Holiday Mindfulness Tips for Teens

It’s the most wonderful time of the year!

 … Except that it is also a time that comes with a long list of things to do: presents to buy, recipes to perfect, family relationships and social commitments to navigate, creating a welcoming and festive home, and covid considerations as well. Even writing this list I am reminding myself of all the things I have yet to do before Christmas arrives!

I don’t know about you, but for myself, these high expectations and competing demands can cause stress. This stress comes from originally setting good intentions for the holiday season to be full of warmth, meaningful connections, and elevated spirits. However, things can get warped when you lose sight of what you find truly important.

Ironically, becoming stressed is completely counterproductive to these original intentions of presence and connection.

 

>>> FREE DOWNLOAD: Mental Health Handbook for Teen Girls <<<

An eBook with 10 mental health exercises every teen girl needs to know to:

  • Improve focus
  • Boost happy hormones naturally
  • Cope with trick feelings
  • Develop self-compassion

I Want the Handbook!

 

Photo by Canva

With this in mind, here are five points of reflection for you and your family this holiday season:

1. Mindfulness Over the Holidays: Determine Your Priorities

What is important to you this holiday season? Recognizing the key points of the holiday can shift your focus away from things on your to-do list that aren’t a priority.

Here are some priorities that come to my mind or have been shared from clients:

  • Spending time with family and loved ones is more important than the setting.
  • Gift giving is a form of love during the holidays.
  • Hosting a family dinner and perfecting a new recipe is a source of holiday joy.
  • Slowing down for self-care is important over the holidays.
  • The holidays are a time to try new things and go on an adventure!

Whatever your priority is this season, know what it is for yourself and focus on that the most.

Photo by Canva

2. Mindfulness Over the Holidays: Set Boundaries

Setting self-care boundaries is essential, especially during a busy season like Christmas where there are numerous events, opportunities, and expectations.

Take a moment to check in with yourself to make informed decisions about what is best for you and your loved ones. If you are “running on empty” and finding yourself stressed, tired, or easily frustrated, maybe the best choice is to sit one of the social engagements out and spend some time “filling up your tank”.

Think of a few strategies that work best for you when you are feeling stressed, whether that be time with others, time alone, a specific activity, exercise, etc. Whatever destressing looks like for you, go for it!

It can also be helpful to have a discussion around holiday expectations and preventing stress with your family.

 

Photo by istock

3. Mindfulness Over the Holidays: Watch Your Thoughts

Thoughts can be tricky and can easily affect your feelings and behaviours if you are not mindful of them.

Some thoughts I’ve heard come up over the holidays that won’t necessarily serve you include: thinking that the house needs to be spotless, food needs to be extravagant, every social event must be attended, or that every loved one should get an individualized, thoughtful gift so they know how much they are love, etc. These are thoughts that can cause stress for the whole family over the holidays!

Notice the word choice in these statements – needs, must, should, every, everyone – words like these lead to black-and-white thinking and can place a lot of pressure on a person. 

While none of these are bad things to want, you can change your thought process by altering your statements around these words. Some examples: “it would be nice if…” or, “I will try my best, but what I really value here is connection over cleanliness”.

This small shift can do wonders in reducing the stress experienced from high expectations.

Your teen daughter can learn how to shift her thoughts in presence, too. Our team has written a blog article on it for your pleasure here.

Photo by Canva

4. Mindfulness Over the Holidays: Be Open to Different Ways of Doing Things

Just because something has always been a certain way does not mean it needs to continue to be that way.

If there are aspects of the holiday season that are causing you stress, consider other ways of doing things. Maybe that looks like a gift exchange or going to an event instead of buying gifts for each family member. Perhaps it looks like a potluck or ordering in instead of one or two people feeling pressure to host a big meal.

The sky is the limit!!

Better yet – what ideas do your kids or partner have for changing the routine? What a great family discussion!

 

Photo by Canva

5. Mindfulness Over the Holidays: Be Present

Once you know your priorities, have healthy boundaries, and are intentional with the time you do have, it becomes easier to be present in whatever relationship or activity you are engaged in.

Worrying about whether or not everything will be perfect on Christmas day or meet everyone’s expectations will not have a significant impact on the outcome and will only drain your energy.

Let tomorrow worry about itself and try to find those silver linings in the moment.

 If you have a teen that struggles with anxiety over the holidays (perhaps perfectionism) and/or depression, you can download our free Anxiety Toolkit for Parents Raising Teens. It comes with 10 tools you can immediately begin implementing for your family this holiday season, as well as a series of mini webinars.

Our gift to you!

 

Photo by Canva

And don’t forget that it is OK to need some extra support, at any time of the year. I offer therapy for teens and young adults, creating lifelong strategies to get through anxious times. You can find my availability and booking link here:

 

Book an Appointment

From all of us here at Pyramid Psychology, we wish you a happy holiday season!

Email us with any questions, any time: info@pyramidpsychology.com

Love,

Jessa

 

Jessa

Jessa is a provisional psychologist living and servicing teens and young adults in Calgary, Alberta.

Jessa is passionate about helping people become the best version of themselves and is continually learning how to best support her clients. She has experience with acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT) and cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT), but most importantly she emphasizes the therapeutic relationship.

A safe, authentic relationship is key for therapy to work. Jessa prioritizes compassion and nonjudgmental curiosity. Together, she can find out what matters most to you and how to get there.

If you think Jessa may be a good match for you, please feel free to reach out and set up a free consult or book a session. She is looking forward to hearing from you!

Once a month, she writes a blog article in response to issues she hears from the parents, teens and young adults she connects with. If you have something you’d like to read more on – email ideas and questions to info@pyramidpsychology.com or DM us via Instagram or Facebook.

winter break
05 Dec
For Teens, Friendships, Relationships

Making the Most of Winter Break for Teen Girls

Making the Most of Winter Break for Teen Girls

Yeayyyh!! You made it through tests and exams! I can only imagine what taking a break from school, waking up early, doing homework, having to be in bed at 9pm and repeat the cycle would look like for you… Winter break might be what you need right now. At the same time having a long break with nothing to do or look forward to can be frustrating and overwhelming. Some teens also experience some winter blues whereby you don’t have access to your school friends, and can’t engage in extracurricular activity as before as everything in relation to school might be closed. Here are some tips to make the most of winter break, and enjoy it!

 

>>> FREE DOWNLOAD: Mental Health Handbook for Teen Girls <<<

An eBook with 10 mental health exercises every teen girl needs to know to:

  • Improve focus
  • Boost happy hormones naturally
  • Cope with trick feelings
  • Develop self-compassion

I Want the Handbook!

 

winter break for teen girls

Photo by Yuri Levin on Unsplash

5 Ways to Make The Most of Winter Break

 

Tip #1 – Develop a Winter Break routine– Just as you have routine for your school week, you could do the same for your  winter break… make it fun and interesting such that you look forward to it every morning and at the end of your day. You can even title it Winter Morning Routine and Winter Night time Routine….

Tip #2 – Plan a family day/ friends day or camping trip- What would a great winter break look like with your loved ones… whatever that looks like for you… Do It. This is the time and moment to be creative and enjoy the outdoors.

Tip #3 – Get a Job for the winter break- Want to get some engaging responsibilities and develop some skills? Then getting a winter job could help with just that. Some creative ways to earn a few bucks could be…. Baby-sitting, dog walking, or retail, getting to maybe get paid by taking on some responsibilities at home, etc.

Tip #4 – Volunteer or be part of a group- Looking for ways to give back and be involved in community? Volunteering your time and effort will always go a long way. Some organizations you can volunteer at could include but not limited to: Youth Central is a good one, Diamond Willow if you are Indigenous), Calgary Sport, also City of Calgary has opportunities for youth

winter break for teen girls

Photo by Natasha Hall

Tip #5 – Start a club- As an individual who takes pride in reading for pleasure and can be fully immersed in a good read… having a book club does wonders for me. Not only does it keep me committed but also allows me to gain different perspectives on the book, the storyline and share in the beauty and humor in between chapters with others. You can do the same… start a book club, cooking club, start a knitting club etc.

Love,

Chipo

Register Social Worker offering counseling for female identifying teens (11-21 years old)

>>> FREE DOWNLOAD: Mental Health Handbook for Teen Girls <<<

An eBook with 10 mental health exercises every teen girl needs to know to:

  • Improve focus
  • Boost happy hormones naturally
  • Cope with trick feelings
  • Develop self-compassion

I Want the Handbook!

 

I am a registered social worker with a Bachelor of Social Work with a major in psychology from the university of the Western Cape, and a Master’s in Clinical Social Work specialization with individuals, families, and groups from the University of Calgary.

In my practice, I note the different intersectionalites that come into play, and I have adapted myself to understanding the effects thereof. I pride myself in working from a holistic and integrative approach using trauma-informed, anti-oppressive, and intersectional lenses in rendering services.

I am grounded by embracing my full humanness-being imperfectly perfect. My faith, family and friendships carry me through life and its happenings. I find being in nature very healing and so is savouring moments. When not working, I love to engage in some fitness, going on walks, journaling, catching up on Korean series, city adventures and reading for pleasure. I also believe in allowing my inner child come out sometimes through art, dancing, building sand castles you name it.

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